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Online Dating Winks and
Icebreakers

We have received several emails asking about online dating winks and icebreakers. The most common questions this site has received about these relatively new terms have been, "What are online dating winks (sometimes called icebreakers)?" and "What does it mean when another member of my online dating site sends me a wink?" This article attempts to answer these two questions completely, as well as to let our visitors know which online personals sites offer these relatively 'new' features to help their members communicate more easily and in a fun new way.

In the world of online dating, there can be different terms which mean the same thing.  Take the terms 'winks' and 'icebreakers', for example. Depending on which dating site you are a member of, the same feature may be called by a different name. Yahoo Personals (Note: Yahoo Personals has now merged with Match.com. Read about the details of this merger here) uses the term "icebreakers" while Match.com uses the tem "winks." So now that you know the same dating site feature may be called by a different term depending on the site, let's get to the questions mentioned above.

What are online dating winks (sometimes called icebreakers)?

Online dating winks are a feature of a dating site that allow members of the same site to contact one another without writing any type of email.  

View All Singles Free
I am a
looking for a
between and
zip/postal code

The key is the 'without writing any type of email' part in the last sentence. So, you may ask yourself, "What is the point? When I contact someone at my dating site to let them know I'm interested,  I like to TELL THEM WHY and WHAT I LIKE ABOUT THEM!"

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Well, at most online dating sites winks are FREE.  So they provide a way for a non-paying member to contact a paying member. At first glance, winks may look like a great feature.  I can join Match.com for free, find someone I like, and send them a wink.  OK, then what? IF they respond, you (as a free member) most likely do not have access to additional features of the site, such as the ability to email other members, so what do you do? If you decide not to become a paying member, then the communication that you have established with the other member will most likely end here. If you DO join the online dating site as a result of someone responding to your wink, then you may email this member back and talk further.  

We personally think winks are an effective way for non-paying members to determine if there is any interest in them from members of the online dating site BEFORE they pay for a membership.  Using winks effectively can help save you money, but just remember if you want to email another member, most sites will at least make you purchase a minimum membership.  If you want to send some Match.com members a wink, you still must join for free. Try sending another Match.com member a wink now!

What does it mean when another member of my online dating site sends me a wink?

This is the next question we receive on this topic. It usually means that a non-paying member is interested in your profile.  You can check them out on the site and respond if you feel you might also be interested in them.  If you do decide to respond to them, just remember that communication may end here UNLESS the wink sender upgrades to a paid membership.  If they do become a paying member and respond to your email with an email of their own, there is a good chance that they were so interested in you that they spent some money to upgrade their dating membership. Pretty cool, huh?  If they don't upgrade and you never hear from them again, this could just mean they're cheap!

What is WebPersonalsOnline.com's view of winks?

While it can make economic sense for some people who are new to dating online and unsure of the process or unsure of making the financial commitment of actually joining a personals site, we still feel that the most effective method of contacting another member of your online dating site is through email. Yes, it usually is only a feature available to paying members, but email allows the person you are contacting to know three things about you:

1) You have ALSO made a financial commitment to online dating
2) You prefer to 'converse' with another person and are not shy about taking the first step towards opening a communication channel
3) You are NOT CHEAP!

What Online Dating Sites allow free members to send winks?

Conclusion

So, while we feel email is the best method for contacting other members of your online dating site, winks do have their place. Winks can allow free members to gauge interest from other paying members before joining the site and they can allow a member of the site to determine if there is any interest from someone viewing their profile, for example. Remember it this way, the wink sender is trying to see if the person to whom they are sending the wink has any interest in them.  The best result is when the recipient of the wink actually emails back the person who sent the wink in the first place. Our view is that winks do have their place, but why not just join the site if you are serious about finding someone to date online and simply send them a nice email in the first place.


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